South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
The beer is more important than you right now.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
