talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
