You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
