ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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