I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
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