wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
