We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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