you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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