Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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