Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
