Quick, to the slutcave!
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize