should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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