I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
