i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize