A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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