Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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