I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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