i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
