I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize