I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize