OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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