Screwed.edu
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
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