Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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