its not stalking. its research.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
