Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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