Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize