we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
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