U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
