Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
