i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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