oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize