Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
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