I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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