Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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