Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize