Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
