sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
