Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
