eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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