I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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