i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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