i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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