Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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