we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
