Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
