you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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