and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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