we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize