I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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