Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
